A Goat walked into my house and said…..

No really, it is not the beginning of a joke, a goat walked into my house last week, he stood not 3 feet from me and we both looked at each other and said “what the heck!!” But his came out a loud BAAAAA!

 
Such is life here in Madagascar. I live in a two story, old, run down, building, constructed by the community. It houses several rooms for community use. There is a room for the doctor, the midwife, student nurses who rotates through, an agriculture extension service and a PC volunteer. I have the smallest area on the second floor, with my own entrance.
The building is enclosed with a brick wall and there is a small yard that leads directly to my outhouse. People bring their goats, cows, geese, ducks to graze in the yard. They are not supposed to do this and the mayor of the town shoos them out if he catches them, but none the less, everyday there is someone new in my front yard, and I wonder who I will have to fight to get to my outhouse.
When it rains a lot, which it is doing now, my yard floods terribly and I need a boat to get to the outhouse.

 
The animals cause a bit of a problem, if I have to use the outhouse when they are grazing in the yard. Yes, I know I have a chamber pot (called a “po” -long “O” in Malagasy) but I only ever pee in my po. It is the number one rule of living with a chamber pot. I learned it the hard way!! #1. Only ever pee in a po!!
The geese are the worse. They literally chase me to the outhouse, honking and trying to bite me. If I carry a stick or any other protective item it seems to make them only more aggressive and they honk louder and become fiercer. I try to sneak by them, walking on the edge of the yard, but they always spot me and come running over. So far, I have been able to out run them and get into the outhouse and close the door before they bite me. They stand at the door honking at me, like my children did when they were small, knocking on the bathroom door ” Mom are you in there, I want a drink of water”! I stay long enough so the geese get tired and leave, then I carefully sneak out and run back up my steps.

 
The goats are next, they seem tame enough, but they want to nibble and try to eat my clothes when I pass them. I have learned to take some scrap vegetable peelings and throw them across the yard so they run over to eat them.
The cows are mostly docile, but they are the large zebu cows with the huge humps on their backs and very long sharp pointed horns, I just have to be careful not to get in the way of one while trying to avoid stepping in their large cow pads.

 
I do try to time my outhouse visits to early morning or late evening when the animals have gone home for the day, but that does not always work.
I guess the worst part is that all these animals use my yard as their outhouse and I have to navigate carefully so I don’t step in any of their droppings while I try to deposit my dropping in my outhouse (kabone in Malagasy).
The next time you use the bathroom try to be grateful for not having to out run a goose or step in any cow droppings!! Small blessings!

Flooding  and very fierce geese- they are daring me to come down

My Kabone – the broom is in case you miss the small opening